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Mirror mirror on the wall...


Hello friends. It’s been a month since my last post. I hope you are all managing to stay well and stay sane during these times of great change? When the storms are raging around us, it’s always good to remember we can be the calm eye of the storm, keep quiet and practice gratitude daily or even hourly, if need be. At a fundamental level, all is well. Today I want to share with you some realisations I have had about relationships. A few years ago I wrote a blog about how we are all projectors and that life is simply a screen that we perceive all around us. What we feel, think and believe are projected out and this determines our experience of the world. By changing our beliefs, just like the film in the projector, the projected image can look very different. Either way it’s all Divine light shining through us all things. 🙏 So if the external world is a screen, then the people we are in the closest relationships with are mirrors. The more we love them, the longer we spend with them, the more shiny the mirror is. I met my twin flame last year and she is the brightest and shiniest of mirrors I have ever encountered. She reflects back to me every wound that I have not yet become conscious of and presses every button I have. This is not an easy process!! OMG.. Like someone waking you up in the dead of night by shining a really bright torch in your eyes! I love Byron Katie. Here is a good quote from her: “Our parents, our children, our spouses, and our friends will continue to press every button we have, until we realize what it is that we don't want to know about ourselves, yet. They will point us to our freedom every time.” So this last few months of lockdown has been super challenging for me but I am now starting to see the silver lining to the dark cloud, the gift, the pearl in the oyster. All our unconscious software programming from childhood is revealed in the relationship mirror, if we are brave enough to look deeply and not look away. I can see clearly that I am a rescuer. Some of you might be rescuers too. On one side of the coin it’s amazing to be kind and compassionate to a partner, but there is also a flip side, a shadow side too. Are we trying to seek appreciation and love from the other because we have a hole we are trying to fill inside us? What I have realised in the last few days is that I am a rescuer because I want to feel loved, so I probably attract people who want to be rescued. What you give out, you shall receive! Like attracts like. Like with all of us, my desire to be a rescuer goes back to childhood and the events that took place then. I say ‘then’ but with time being an illusion, it’s all happening now inside us. The past is never really in the past, it’s always here until it’s healed. So the relationship mirror is showing me clearly now that the biggest self realisation I can have is that I already am the love I am looking for. I am whole. I am not separate from God. Never was. Never could be. My new mantra is this: I am loved. I am love. Try it yourself. Hand on your heart and say it. I am loved. I am love. Breath deeply. Feel the truth of it. Remembering who we are is about the switch from looking outside to looking inside, from looking for love and appreciation from other people to realising we had it inside us all along. Like the moment when you are running through a dark wood holding a torch chasing the light and then suddenly realising you are holding the light. You are the light! So I am grateful to the people in my life who offer the shiniest and clearest of mirrors. It can be very challenging to clearly see the image coming back, but that is where the lessons, learning and freedom lies. All we have to do is notice, take a deep breath and send so much love to ourselves. Hug our inner child as tightly as we can and know we are always loved. We are always love. The relationship mirror also reflects the love that we already are. This is very confusing to us humans! Someone says they love you and it seems like the love is flowing from them to you, but this isn’t the case at all. They are simply reflecting back the love you already are, the love you already have inside you! How much of our human lives do we spend looking to be loved, appreciated and accepted?! It’s crazy isn’t it. The greatest quest we go on turns out it’s not looking for love outside of us, it’s realising we already are the love we seek. Byron Katie nails it with this simple idea for a prayer: “I often say that if I had a prayer, it would be this: God, spare me from the desire for love, approval, or appreciation. Amen.” So my friends, use your mirrors wisely and bravely. Keep an open mind and an open heart to what is being shone back to you to notice. And with this coronavirus situation, this is also a massive opportunity to see more clearly about ourselves and our relationship to our beautiful planet. When we notice, we can change. When we deeply notice, we will change. Be well. Much love Rob 🙏❤️ remember who we are


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